Bugchicklv's RayneBaby! and RayneKid! Fics
by bugchicklv
Summary: Just what the title says. RiverJayne fluffies. Mostly. NOT NECESSARILY CHRONOLOGICAL, so pay attention. Some LiveJournal fanfic100 submissions, in no prompt order. Rated G to NC17. Family Tree & Timeline will be in part 10.
1. Precious Lives

Title: Precious Lives (prequel to "Daddy's Girl)  
Author: bugchicklv Etc.: Guess I forgot to do this on the past, what? dozen or so fics I have posted. Oh well, we all know that these characters are not mine, cause if they were...Rayne would be CANON! Sooooo this is dedicated to Debby. Also, thanks to Crazywriterchic. Her recent story provided the inspiration on Jayne's gift. I know she was inspired by Lokaia, and I have mentioned his handiwork in the other RayneBabyFics, so at least there is SOME continuity. This does not necessarily take place in the same 'verse as "The Casino Job" or its predecessors. Warnings for Violence and one curse word. Oh so very fluffy...

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Luckily it was the last job planned after they had finally fenced The Lassiter (some two years after it was stolen), because none of them had made it out of this skirmish unscathed. They were going to need a long break.

On a barren and deserted moon, Lu Khang and his bunch had, somehow, gotten the jump on them. While Mal, Zoe, Book and Jayne were fighting off one group of six at the drop-point, another ambushed the ship.

Surprisingly, Inara had proven to be an excellent shot, putting a bullet in one of the hoodlum's heads from the catwalk as he stood holding a roughed up Wash, River, Simon and Kaylee at gunpoint on the cargo bay floor. The five other thugs had rushed back in from where they'd been searching Serenity (and readying her for stealing)  
once they heard the shot reverberate.

But it had provided the rag-tag crew with just enough time to get to the weapons waiting in hidden spots, as Jayne was fond of doing in recent months.

"Just in case," or "better safe than sorry," he'd said.

And he'd been right.

The ensuing fight was almost as bloody as the one going on outside; but at any rate, none of the thieves remained alive to tell the tale of their stupidity. No one screwed with Serenity's crew without a fight.

Now, a wavering Simon--his left hand broken, and bleeding from another gunshot wound to his leg--worked with Zoe--who had 4 broken ribs and a hideous knife wound to her own thigh--to pull the three bullets out of Mal and sew up his deep head and arm lacerations. Once he was barely stable, they moved on to take the two bullets out of Book, the next badly injured.

Kaylee, her nose broken and face bleeding, did her best to help River, whose right shoulder was dislocated, to remove the bullet from Wash's chest; to tend to Inara's broken ankle and sprained wrist; and to relieve Simon when he finally collapsed while sewing Zoe's wound.

River eventually retrieved the bullet fragments from her brother, but it was slow-going with out the use of her dominant hand, and without Kaylee--who just couldn't keep it together any longer. No one begrudged the usually happy mechanic her weakness; she had done her best.

Inara then helped River reset Kaylee's nose.

An exhausted River moved on to see to Jayne, her secret husband of the past three months. He looked about ready to faint from blood loss.

When they had first come stumbling back, him carrying Mal and helping Zoe to drag Book, River saw that he had been shot in the side again, and that a bullet had cut a furrow through his scalp.

On this day, they had both been very lucky. After she staunched his bleeding with a multiple compresses and flitted back to his side, Jayne had squeezed her hand and told her to go help the others first, to stay with them. Right now, they needed her more.

Well, now she needed him.

She walked him out to the common area on unsteady, weak legs and sat him down on the sofa.

"Ai ren? I need you to help me. Pragmatic muscle--no one else is can, or is strong enough. You need help me reset my wing."

"Baby Girl, I just...I can't."

"You can," she told him. "I believe in you. I trust you, bao bei. I need you, please," she begged him, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "It hurts so badly."

She sounded so normal on occasion, that he only nodded in miserable understanding. He used the last of his strength to put his foot in her arm-pit, pull on her arm, and twist it--popping it back into place. River screamed in agony and Jayne was VERY glad to be passing out at that point. He didn't think his heart could bear to hear that ever again. Too often would eat at his soul.

River didn't bother trying to move him. With tears of pain, and tears of concern for him and the others, she sewed and bandaged his wounds as best she could. And then she fervently hoped that no one needed blood. They just didn't have it, and she could only pilot the ship so far (without Wash's or the Captain's help) in order to find some. She wasn't sure what, if anything, Inara could do with her shuttle as support--they WERE pretty far out.

As Mal, who was connected to (a slowly becoming unneccessary form of) life support, and Book recuperated in the infirmary--and as the others rested in their rooms--River fell asleep sitting on the floor of the common room with her head on Jayne's lap...as he lay passed out on the couch. She needed his strength to for the coming days, and would get it by Osmosis if necessary. Once, a few hours later, he awoke just long enough to wrap his left hand in her hair and to take her left hand in his right one. Softly, so as not to wake her, he brought it to his mouth for a kiss. "My quan xin quan yi," he whispered. "Wo ai ni.

With a grimace, he noticed that the string she had been wearing as the symbol of their troth was drenched in blood.

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Two days later, her right arm still hanging in a home-made sling, River dropped into his bunk to check on him.

"Dr. Tam v 2.0, at your service. Khang fu is next on rounds. Captain Daddy took air on his own yesterday. He likes breathing. Pretty Lady won't leave his side."

Jayne let loose a very small laugh and said, "I bet your brother is going ape-shit over you doin' his job."

"He'll get over it. Kaylee wears white well, follows instructions; gives fearful pair lots of time together," she told him with a wry smile.

He tried to smile in return, but he was not all that happy.

"Shouldn't have let all that happen," he muttered, disappointed in himself. "Coulda had a better plan, and contingencies. Then we wouldn't'a gotten all shot up.

"Coulda, shoulda, woulda," River told him. "No, Jayne; no recriminations. What's done is done and all's well if'n we're still flying. A little more'n a worse for wear, yes, but alive and shiny."

On occasion, when she wasn't aware of it, she had even begun to sound a bit like him.

Jayne called her over and she sat next to him on the bed they'd shared on numerous occasions in the recent past, with none the wiser. He unknotted the string she had tried to scrub somewhat clean, and slipped on a small, polished, wooden band that he had whittled for her.

"Someone's going to notice that," she said with a smile as tears formed in her eyes.

"Let 'em," he growled and kissed her hungrily, like a man starving for redemption, for forgiveness. For Love.

They were quick to undress, unheeding of their wounds and pain, and they made love frantically. He ripped out most of his stitches in the exertion; she almost passed out from the pain in her shoulder...but they would let nothing stand between them and their need for each other in their

Later, River lay sprawled atop Jayne, her head on his shoulder and hair spread over him like a blanket. Lazily, he twirled a lock of her hair around one of his fingers and she ran her own hand through the springy curls on his chest.

Slowly, she lifted her head, tears once again forming, and she smiled at him enigmatically.

At his questioning look she kissed him softly and whispered to him, breathlessly in awe, "We just made a baby."

Jayne pulled her closer, tighter to him and whispered back with a grunt, "Good."

'Cause, like Zoe, he wasn't so afraid of losing something that he wasn't going to try to have it.

Exactly what he decided on the day he'd asked her to marry him.

Then, Jayne Cobb slept a sound and peaceful sleep, and dreamt of a beautiful, miniature version of his wife.

And River noticed that her ring had been inscribed with her name: River T. Cobb.

She smiled, and knew she was finally home. 


	2. Fairy Tale Endings

Title: Fairy Tale Endings (sequel to "Precious Lives)  
Author: bugchicklv Etc.: Oh, so very fluffy Raynefic. And there's sex.

THIS IS SO VERY NC-17!

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The next morning Jayne was late to rise. He rolled over with a sigh and a wince wanting to spoon with his wife--maybe even get a little wake-up sex. Only, she wasn't there.

"Ai ya," he muttered, disappointed to find the pillow cold. She'd obviously been up for a while, and it made Jayne angry to think that she had left to keep their secret.

Thought that got settled last night, he thought with a huff.

After hastily pulling on his pants and a shirt, the grumpy man then climbed the ladder, gingerly, and was assaulted by the delicious smell of breakfast cooking. Selfishly, he hoped that is was River because, not only was his wife a crack shot, a ruttin' genius, and a hell-cat in bed--but she'd proven to be an excellent cook once everyone had given her the chance. Basically, she was perfect for him, in every way.

Jayne's mood improved greatly when he noticed, upon entering the galley, that River was indeed the one at the stove. And she was making pancakes--his favorite.

"Mornin' Jayne," Kaylee called.

Poor girl looked a fright with those broken-nose induced black eyes, but nothing could dampen her spirits for very long. Especially since things had been going so well between her and the Doc, for a while now.

"Mornin'," he called back. Jayne then stepped up behind River and hugged her tightly. As if that wasn't enough to halt the breakfast table conversation, what he did next certainly did.

The Merc snatched the spatula out of Rivers left hand, spun her around, dipped and bent her back-wards over his arm where he kissed her hungrily. He had intended to pull her upright swiftly after doing it, but his wife had other plans. She wrapped her arm tightly around his back, slid her hand up to the back of his head, and ferociously kissed him back.

After a few moments of this, with part of a stunned crew looking on and feeling a bit like they were intruders, Jayne pulled her up and grabbed her to him tightly. He was breathing hard and his eyes were heavy lidded; it was easy to see what was on his mind. VERY easy to see.

"Y'all are just gonna have ta finish breakfast on your own. 'Cause right now, I need my wife a whole helluva lot more than any of you do," he told them, moving behind her.

River smiled brightly at the open-mouthed crew and had just enough time to hold up her left hand. As she wiggled her fingers, proudly showing off her ring, Jayne shoved her forward to-wards his--their bunk.

Naturally Simon was the first to respond.

"Did he say WIFE?" he shrieked. "Did I miss something? I thought that was over between them a good while ago..."

"Oh, shiny!" a dreamy Kaylee responded. "I think it's the best news we had in months. Look how happy she is again Simon; she even made pancakes!"

"But married? That means he's--we're--oh, God. Captain, please tell me you are going to do something about this."

"And just what would you have me do? I did enough yellin' when Zoe and Wash did it, and did that do any good? Hell no! Gorram ship full of googly-eyed lovers," Mal groaned barely able to sit up. But he was determined to get back to captain-y things; which obviously included eating.

"Besides, your sister's been a whole lot more focused and a whole lot less crazy lately. Ever since they started up, as a matter of fact. I feel like I should be thanking the hun dan for doin' what all your drugs never seemed to do."

Simon looked at the Captain, hurt and chagrined.

Kaylee, happy that he was not going to interfere with her friends' happiness, leaned over and kissed Mal on the cheek. "I love my Captain."

"Yeah, well how 'bout you showin' how much by finishing up them pancakes?" he commented.

To cheer him a bit, and hopefully smooth over his anger at Jayne, and disappointment in Mal, Kaylee kissed Simon on the lips as she stood up.

Placing one hand over the bandage at his shoulder, Mal, still a bit confused about the whole marriage-thing, asked, "Shepherd, did you have a hand in this? 'Cause I don't remember going to any drive-thru wedding chapels or stopping anywhere long enough for them to run off and get hitched."

Book swallowed the coffee he realized had been in his mouth since the kiss, replied, "I don't think so, Captain."

"Excuse me? Don't think so? No offense, put I'd hope you would remember my sister and that--that--Jayne," he spat, "standing before you and proclaiming them man and wife."

Laying a hand over one of his own bandages, Book responded, "Well Son, I never did that, certainly."

"Then it doesn't count, right? You never said 'man and wife'. Maybe no one said 'man and wife'. Isn't it some kind of unwritten rule that they have to be proclaimed 'man and wife'?" Poor Simon was near hysterical at this point.

Mal's uncomfortable look came at the same time as Kaylee's, "Not necessarily. Right, Cap'n?"

Inara silent through all of this, pursed her lips in irritation and refused to comment. Mrs. Reynolds was still a sore point between them.

"Thanks for the reminder," he said wryly. "There was definitely no 'man and wife' for me and YoSaffBridge. I think. Damn, I was all manner of drunk." Laughing, he asked, "Jayne still got that stick? Maybe he could offer it to you for River."

At Simon's outraged expression, Mal added, "Just kidding! Damn, you are so easy."

"Son, Kaylee does have a point...one well illustrated by our hapless Captain. The Triumph Marriage Ceremony only required a wreath, some wine, and a dance," the Shepherd offered. "One can only guess what archaic or brand new ceremony they chose to consecrate their union."

"Well, I don't recall River given Jayne no hat made outta flowers and we ain't had no wine since Kaylee's inter-engine malfunctioned, so...who knows?" replied Mal who was busy checking on the wound at his side and paling considerably as his fingers probed.

"Who knows, indeed. In some cultures, it is only necessary for a man to call a woman his wife and to have her agree in order for it to be official," Inara finally offered. "Frankly, I am surprised that it took this long. No matter our feelings on the matter, we should support their decision."

Simon dropped his head heavily onto the arms he had crossed on the table-top, then yelped when he landed partially on his broken hand. "This is a nightmare," he whined.

"Inara's right. We can't really say nothing, Doc. They're adults--well, River is anyway, and as long as it don't become a problem..." Mal trailed off, shrugging.

Kaylee finished at the stove and brought the huge stack of pancakes over too the table as Zoe limped in to join them. She had been on the bridge with Wash and missed the excitement.

"There are problem, Sir?" she asked having caught only the tail end of his sentence. Not waiting for his reply, she quickly stabbed a few pancakes. She was starving.

"River and Jayne got MARRIED!" Kaylee announced cheerfully.

Zoe looked up from her food and asked, "Did I miss something?" while wincing a bit and touching her ribs as she tried to turn and look a Mal.

"That's what I said!" Simon whined miserably as he picked at his food.

Around a mouthful, the Captain replied, "Seems we all did, Zoe"

"All did what?" asked Wash as he entered the galley, gingerly took his own seat and stopped his wife from loading his plate. He didn't want her to injure herself any more than she already was.

"Evidently, husband, we all missed River and Jayne's marriage ceremony."

"If there was one," reminded Inara.

Fork pausing in mid-air, Wash asked, "You mean they got married? That's kinda...scary. Bet it involved guns," he added with a laugh.

The rest of the table joined him, but were still a bit uncomfortable with the whole idea. Everyone that is, except Kaylee, who had a faraway look in her eye as she rested her chin on her palm, elbow on the table.

"Naw. I'm thinkin' it was real romantic," she whispered.

Little did they know--Inara, Wash, and Kaylee were each partially right.

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Jayne sighed heavily and spit out a mouthful of her hair. They'd worn themselves out with a marathon bout of secret late-night sex, and River had finally collapsed on his chest, her hair everywhere.

"'Mon, Baby girl, roll off. I gotta hit the head," he told her.

"How romantic," she murmured, her own mouth full of hair as well. But she obliged and scooted to the side next to the wall so he could get up.

When Jayne came back he found her sitting on his bed, naked, polishing a recently used and smudged Vera. His breath caught at the sight and his heart leapt up into his throat.

It was the sexiest, most thoughtful, most incredible thing he'd ever seen. And he decided right then and there, that he wanted to see it everyday for the rest of his life.

If she'd have him.

"So, uh...you wanna...get, you know...hitched?" he stammered.

She paused in mid stroke, the cloth still in her hand, cocked her head to the side as if to think about it and said without looking up, "Yes."

"What?" he asked. "You serious?"

"Of course," she replied, "weren't you?" she finished, suspicious of his intent.

"Hell yeah! Wouldn't'a asked if I wasn't. Do you want me to go talk to the Shepherd?"

"Probably not a good idea; I don't want him to scare you into backing out. He's very good at that. I think it would be best if we did not inform the others of our intentions, as well."

"First of all, that ain't gonna happen, me backin' down from the preacher. Second, why not?" he asked, pouting since he felt slightly insulted.

She looked at him skeptically for his fearless declaration, hooked Vera back into her resting spot, and patted the bed for him to sit next to her. As he did, she took his hand and turned to him.

"They're not ready yet," she told Jayne in answer to his question. Then River looked him deeply in the eyes.

"I promise not to make fun of your name anymore, to ask before I borrow your guns--unless it is an emergency, and to not cut you again. At least not willingly and not on purpose. I vow to follow you wherever you may choose to go, just please ask me first. I swear to kiss you at every opportunity, and well. I promise to bear your progeny, to remain faithful, to take care of you when you are injured and to fight by your side as the team we will be from now on. I swear by all I believe in, that I will love you for as long as I draw breath."

Touching his cheek softly, she added, "You are my other half, in all ways. You make me whole." Then she looked at him expectantly.

"Oh, you want me to say somethin'?" he asked sheepishly. "Uh, well...I promise not to call you names no more--you know, the mean ones, to ah...try and get along with your uptight pi gu of a brother a little better--but I ain't guaranteein' that'll turn out. Also, I swear, I ain't ever gonna hit ya, no matter what the reason, and you already know I won't turn either you or the Doc over to the Alliance. I promise to keep you safe from all them blue-handed guys, and anyone else that tries to do you harm, that I ain't ever gonna cheat on ya. And I promise to...you know, like you said."

River waited, holding her breath.

"Yeah, I promise to...to...you know--love you for as long as I'm breathin' too. Prolly even after."

"You make me feel like I am somebody, and you make me wanna do better," he finished.

River squealed, yes squealed, since it was the first time he had said how he felt, out loud anyway, in a very long time--and threw her arms around his neck to kiss him.

But before she did, she whispered, "Man and Wife."

He laughed, and as her lips met his he pulled her down to the bed and rolled her under him. Jayne broke the kiss after a few moments and asked, confused, "So. Was that it? We married now? Seems a little too easy and I don't remember a preacher bein' here."

"Well, not yet," she answered. "Don't need a man of God to proclaim what we already know. But you need to get me a ring to mark me as yours and the we have to consummate our vows to..."

Shoving her aside, Jayne hastily dug in the bag by the bed. But he'd smoked the last of his cigars last night, and he tended to rip off the bands just before he lit them.

River watched him, intrigued as he jumped up and practically ransacked the room. He held up a grenade and eyed the pin. Then he put it back in the ruck sack.

It might have worked, but what would he have done with a live grenade?

Jayne was ready to give up when he noticed that the string on his blanket was coming unraveled at the end. He pulled on it roughly...and it unraveled some more. With a huff, he reached over her, grabbed Binky, cut the fibers swiftly and shoved the knife back into it's sheath.

River smiled excitedly when she finally realized what he intended and held out her left hand. Jayne gently wrapped the the yarn around her finger, knotted it off after several revolutions and kissed it when he was done.

"Tied the knot!" she announced proudly.

River then tackled him with a laugh and he caught her close flipped her over and began tickling her. River squirmed and tried to escape, barely able to breathe--she was so very ticklish.

But after a few moments, she stopped resisting and began squirming and gasping for a completely different reason:

Jayne was an excellent marksman and always hit his target. This also held true for his tongue.

All River could do was grab hold of the mattress and enjoy the ride, because Jayne loved to bring her to the very edge this way, then send her over just as he entered her. He reveled in the way she felt as her muscles contracted around him, as she arched up bringing him deeper, and in hearing her softly moan his name in ecstasy

And this is exactly what he did. Smiling with manly pride, he basked in her afterglow for a moment before he began thrusting into her, powerfully.

River was a small-ish woman, and sometimes she looked downright frail. But Jayne knew better. He knew how much she could take and how much she would demand of him. IF she felt like he was holding back at all, she'd growl at him, "Deeper, harder!" and wrap her legs around him to make sure he did so. She'd scratch him, bite him, even flip HIM over and ride him HARD till they both came if she thought for a second that he was being gentle for fear of hurting her.

She was also very flexible.

So, Jayne ceased holding back a long time ago; tonight was no different. Without stopping his thrusts he grabbed her left leg behind her knee and put it on his right shoulder. He leaned over onto his right elbow to free his own left hand and with his calloused thumb Jayne assaulted her swollen clit.

"More!" she begged frantically, and bit his shoulder. Then River dug her other heel into his waist and rose up to meet his thumb and thrusts. She closed her eyes and pulled his head down so that their foreheads touched.

"River...look at me," he choked out and paused mid-thrust, waiting--holding on by a thread, for her to do so.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I know," she whispered back, tearing up.

It was difficult, but they both managed to keep their eyes open, looking deeply into each others' as they came together.

Breathing hard and fast as he lay atop her, Jayne rose up, kissed her lips lightly and whispered, "Man...and Wife."

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After leaving the galley and dropping down into their room, Jayne barely managed to get his fly unbuttoned and pants down to his knees before River shoved him down into the chair. She yanked up her skirt and once again he found himself grateful that she hardly ever wore underwear. Jayne grabbed her by the waist and helped her climb on.

River held tightly to the chair's back with her good left arm, and wrapped her legs around him and the legs of the chair beneath his ass. She was wild with abandon, rough and demanding as always, and he let her take control.

This time, he was the one who could only hang on and enjoy the ride.

Later, once they had moved their exertions to the bed, Jayne held River closely with one strong arm wrapped around her shoulders. The other hand he placed lightly on her stomach, and he chuckled.

"What?" she asked.

"Got so excited kissin' on ya that I didn't get to see their faces when they found out we was married. No way in hell I'm missin' the fun when we tell 'em 'bout this!"

Just then his stomach rubbled and they both laughed.

"Yeah, not much'll keep me from your pancakes. Prolly none left," he said disappointed.

"Can't let my dragon-slayer go unfed. He'll need his strength to face the music. I'll make more," she promised. "It will give you time to tell the others of our impending parenthood. Don't sit next to Simon," she warned.

As an after-thought, she added: "And hide the knives." 


	3. Daddy's Little Girl

"Daddy's Girl"

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Boo, cleaned and reassembled, clicked loudly, and Jayne smiled as the baby responsively gurgled and cooed. With his right foot he continued rocking the bassinette where his 7 month-old daughter lie watching him with those huge River-brown eyes. He winked at her and moved on to reassemble Vera.

As Jayne replaced the barrel, she began cooing again; and when he test fired...

CLICK

...she laughed and clapped excitedly. Jayne grinned with pride, then picked her up to kiss her forehead through the curly brown hair.

"You may be the spittin' image o'yer Ma," he said. "But you're so MY girl!" 


	4. Simon Says

"Simon Says"

Simon tried for the tenth time to get his niece to eat the pureed vegetables. Each time he brought the spoon to her mouth she scrunched up her face and refused to cooperate.

Once more he offered her the food and, to his surprise, she opened her mouth and ate it!

Perseverence and patience, he attributed it to, quite proud of his accomplishment.

What he failed to see was River standing behind him giving the baby that "Mom Look" with one delicately raised eyebrow. Once she was satisfied her daughter was cooperating, she continued through the kitchen to the bridge.

Only, now that Mom was out of sight, the precocious little girl sprayed her mouthful all over Uncle Simon.

A few minutes later, Simon, covered in green gooey vegetable paste, handed the giggling baby to the loudly laughing Merecenary.

With a sniff he told Jayne, "You are SO her father!" 


	5. Home is Where the Heart Is

Title: Home Is Where The Heart Is Author: bugchicklv Etc.: So, it looks like my Casino Job fics WILL HAVE to connect at some point with the addition of this fic to the RayneBabyFic Set. This is just some fluffy Daddy!Jayne stuff, but it does have some sexual content near the end. SECOND HALF IS SOOOOO NC-17!

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"What is this, Daddy?" Francesca asked, chewing on a strand of hair and holding up a cardboard box.

Jayne tugged the lock of hair out of her mouth and tucked it behind her ear. Then he took the discovery from her grasp and admonished the young girl to be careful.

"This was the first thing I ever bought fer yer Ma, Frankie. It's fragile," he added as he pulled the package from the box.

Fascinated, she asked, "Really? What did you buy it for?"

"Her birthday--long ways back. Well, I guess it wasn't all that long ago, but it was before you were born...before we even got married. Yer Ma kept it in this here box to protect it, keep it safe."

At her expectant look, he knew he had to elaborate, so he sat down to explain.

"Ok. See, we was at this casino--"

"What's a Casino?"

"Fancy place were you lose a lot of money. Unless you are a genius, or with a genius, then it's only bad for them's that'r uptight pretentious folk--"

"What's a genius?"

"Someone real smart-like. Got themselves some schoolin' so they's, well--top 3 percent...or better."

"So, who was the genius?"

"Why, yer Ma, of course," he answered incredulously.

"And you didn't lose your money?" she asked, impressed.

"Nope. Made a fistful of coin that night, actually--"

"What were you doing there?"

"We had a job--" he started.

"What kind of job?"

"Only kind that count: one that paid--"

"So you made even more money?"

"Yeah, I guess I did--"

"What did you do with it, besides buy Mommy the present?"

"Stuff. Look, Frankie...you want me to tell ya the story or what? 'Cause we could cut this little break short and get back to packin' and movin' all this stuff to the other rooms," he told her, impatiently.

Francesca nodded contritely and looked down. Jayne could see her bottom lip begin to wobble, so he sighed heavily.

"Awwww, don't do that. I'm sorry, baby. C'mere," he called her over. "I didn't mean to snap atcha. Yer Pa's just a bit tetchy lately. Them babies don't seem to EVER sleep at the same time. And with River doin' her best to feed 'em both with what she's got...well, you'd think that after almost three gorram months they'd..." he trailed off and sighed again.

"You miss Mommy? She has been so very busy," the girl offered.

"Yeah. Kinda hard to sleep good now without her next to me for a whole night--like you and your wubby. Maybe with all of us movin' to the dorm to have more space, things'll get better--don'tcha think?"

"I know it will. Will you finish the story now?"

Jayne smiled and lifted her up onto his lap and put the package in hers. He kissed the top of her head then continued.

"So we're at this fancy flying casino, and...well, we was all so busy that somehow, everyone forgot her Birthday had passed--even Aunt Kaylee! I felt real bad for it, so when I saw this in the store window, I just knew I had to get it for her. I went inside, paid the man way too gorram much for it, and had it wrapped so that it would be a surprise. Then, I took it back to my--her room where she was...uh, painting, yeah painting."

Laughing, the big man added, "She took for-ruttin'-ever opening it too! She wanted to save the paper--this here paper it's wrapped in as a matter of fact."

Lightly fingering the paper and marvelling at it's texture, Francesca looked down to study it more closely and told him, "It feels rich, Daddy."

"Well, it oughta considerin' what I paid for it!" Jayne complained loudly, but half-heartedly. "Anyway, mine was her first gift all night and she musta liked it a whole bunch," he added, then smiled at the memory of what occurred later.

The precocious girl cocked her head and asked, "How do you know?"

Flustering a bit, Jayne finally answered, "'Cause--well, she told me she did! Yep, that's why."

Satisfied, the girl said, "Oh, OK. Show me it's secrets Daddy...what is it?"

Jayne untucked the folded corners and revealed the beautiful Mother-of-Pearl inlaid box. The little girl's enormous brown eyes widened in awe, and then narrowed to focus in extreme curiosity. The chuckling father turned the box over and wound the key--then opened it to reveal the delicate Ballerina and to start the music.

"Oh, Daddy!" Francesca said breathlessly. "It looks just like Mommy when she dances!" she exclaimed a few seconds later.

"Ha! That's what I thought when I saw it, baby," he told her. Jayne then leaned down to whisper conspiratorially, "But your Ma is a whole lot purtier. And so are you," he added kissing her head again.

That made Francesca giggle.

Suddenly, Jayne had an idea. "C'mon," he said as he pulled her to her feet. She looked at him, confused.

"Put yer feet on mine, Frankie," he suggested, and she immediately complied.

"Yer Ma taught me how to dance...well, dance right anyway." He held her tightly by the hands and he began to move slowly around the small room.

Francesca leaned back to look up, adoringly, at her Father. "I love you, Daddy," she told him with an enormous smile.

She looked so very much like River at that moment that his breath caught and he once again thanked whatever benevolent deity had gifted him with this family. ALL of his family--everyone on Serenity.

Laughing, he lifted her up into his strong, steady arms, and they continued to dance until well after the music ended.

Finally, after moving all of their belongings into the two adjoining rooms and settling the children down to sleep in the beds next door, the couple lay on their new bed--spooning for the first time in weeks.

River casually mentioned that she had heard the music box.

"Frankie found it and wanted to know the story," Jayne told her as he hugged his wife tightly to him, breathing deeply of her apple-scented hair.

Smiling, she asked, "Mature content. I hope you edited it to an appropriate level of content and context for a 4-year old removing references to Mature Themes, Graphic Violence and Sexual Situations. You did, right?"

"Course I did," he huffed. "Figured you could tell her some more A-proprit kinda stuff 'bout us seein' as how I know you can do it better. You always use the differen't voices and stuff and that's Frankie's favorite. Anyway..." he trailed off.

She turned over within the circle of his arms and looked at him expectantly.

"What?" she asked.

"Oh. Weren't nothin'."

"Zhang-fu, I could always just read your--"

"Ai ya! All right," he grudgingly acquiesced. Jayne put his arm around River's shoulders and she rested her head on his as she waited for him to continue. "I...danced with her. Like I did with you that night--only she weren't nekkid," he added with a lecherous grin and a twinkle in his eye. "River, gorram Baby-Girl--she's real graceful. Maybe when you are up to it, you can teach her some o' that kinda stuff."

"Teach her what, my big, fuzzy, clock-dweller? I've been teaching her how to dance since she could stand," she told him. "Like a butterfly, she was born to danc."

"Guessin' that's kinda meaning she's just like her Ma? River-girl, she is you're spitting image! Wonder why she acted like she didn't know what we were doin', like she didn't know how?"

"Because, simple like calculus: Wisdom imparted from mother to daughter takes a long time to germinate and it's practical application not achievable within the first 14-15 years at best...thus it is reserved for use at a later date. Francesca is is 50 each of us, but is solely her Father's progeny." At his blank look, River added "she is a 'Daddy's Girl'. Makes you a hero, the things you say become gospel, the things you do become legends and myths and fairy tales.

The statement made him grin proudly; after all, he knew he was a good Papa and took pains to give his better'n he had--not that he was complainin' 'bout his Ma or nothin; they'd done the best they could. "Well, there's lotsa stuff that I can teach her too, you know," he reminded her.

River crawled sinuously on top of him and said with a seductive smile, "I know. And it is always enough for tenure. Ummmm...yes, Professor Humbert deserves his bits of apple-flesh for a job well-done," she added, purring and offering herself up for tasting.

Missng her innuendo and reference, Jayne told her, "Lotsa stuff you got outta them books, too. Bet 'Nara never woulda given 'em to ya if she'd known."

River huffed a bit and answered, "Possibly, but unlikely. 'One must see to one's own personal, sexual-health and education first,'" River mimicked in her best Inara-voice. Unstoppable Force will always triumph over immoveable object. Needed those user's guides to understand and care for my model-Jayne; playbooks necessary to make him mine--only had to chase him until he finally stopped and caught me; simultaneous score for both sides--Touchdown!" she told him as she traced her finger down his 'Happy Trail', her final word punctuating the path of her hand as it wrapped firmly, possessively, around him.

Jayne laughed and asked as his hands spanned the swell of her buttocks, "So this is like our Victory Dance?" When she grinned and nodded, he pulled her down for a kiss...but paused, their yearning lips separated from each others' by a shared breath.

"What?" River whispered, breathlessly.

With a pout, Jayne told her, "Just waitin' for the babies to cry and spoil our fun."

Shaking her head, she firmly stated, "Not relevant."

Confused, he asked, "Well, why not?"

Rubbing herself against him she said, "Brother-Boob volunteered himself and Not-Really-Feeling-Like-Strawberry-Sunshine to take the extended watch. 'Need th' practice with handlin' more'n one of them, just in case, you know?' she told me," River said, imitating Kaylee to perfection this time. "Installed receiving comm in child's room earlier; promised to attend them at the first sounds of wakefulness. Francesca would simply slide down the rabbit hole to have tea in Wonderland with Inara, or climb up her Zoe-Tree to be told of the Technicolor World and Terrible Thunder Lizards."

As she moved to sit astride him, Jayne slowly realized what his wife was saying. "So, you mean...no interruptions?" he asked, his voice tinged with excitedment.

"Exempting unforseen Acts by Diety's and catastrophic mechanical failure, no. None are anticipated; the interruption that you have created with all of this verbal communication is most distressing. I can think of a much more pleasurable use for your mouth," River purred as she leaned forward to press her breasts against his chest.

Grasping her bottom in his large hands and lifting his hips to thrust firmly against her, he answered with a cocky smile, "I bet you can, Baby Girl. I bet you can."

River always got what she wanted.

A short while later, Jayne felt a moment of panic. He tugged her leg off of his shoulder and stopped mid-thrust, his arm muscles quivering with excitment and from exertion.

"Wait," he told her breathlessly, lifting his head only slightly and looking at her through his lashes.

"Wait? What, NOW?" River asked incredulously, and slightly frustrated at yet another interruption. She lifted her hips to meet his, attempting to draw him back and finish what he started while her fingers wrapped tightly around tufts of the hair on his chest and pinched his nipples hard.

He groaned out the word "Baby-girrrrrrrrrrl," in response and pulled his torso up and away just a little, but her strong thighs grasped firmly to make sure he remained seated within her and her hands moved to encircle him so that her nails could scratch heavy marks down his back and would bite sharply into his buttocks.

The heavily aroused Merc hissed and groaned and moaned with pleasure, but managed to clear his head, "Did ya...aaahhh ah yes...you know...uuummm oh man...talk with the Doc...hhiissss hell yeah...you know, about them shots?" he hurridly finished.

With a predatory gleam, River heaved and flipped them both over; she pinned his shoulders to the bed and ground down upon him.

"No more needles," she growled, her hair wildly framing her face. Then she leaned down and bit him hard on the chest--twice--leaving faintly forming bruises as her mouth's calling card, while one hand moved behind her to scratch his thighs.

Again, he groaned in pleasure at how his wife continued to man-handle him but between her bites, pinches, scratches, and love-taps he kept trying to get out his concern.

As she continued to ride him, River's fingers roughly twisted his nipples and her teeth firmly held and pulled on his bottom lip, Jayne mumbled, "No...ah, yes...I mean...gawd Baby,...please...don't stop that but...oh...you gotta let your man have his peace."

"He is, he will. Pieces of me once again shattered into one," she replied as she yanked his hair back and to the side so that she could suck ferociously at his neck.

"Ai ya, "Peace," not "piece"! Baby-Girl, you are in rare form tonight, ain't'cha?" he asked with a leacherous grin and waggle of his brows. Her response was a feral growl.

Suddenly no longer content with having her lead, Jayne snatched River's head back by her hair and grabbed her hip. Then he quickly rolled them both over, trapping her hands between them as he did.

"Now, did ya talk to the gorram Doc 'bout getting them shots or do I gotta tie ya up and torture ya some more with my tongue?" he asked as he teased her by flicking the tip out to lick sweet salty sweat from just under her ear. Slowly his breathing returned to closer to normal.

"Repeat please?" she squeeked "Unable to process...wait. Shots, yes. Of course I did--we discussed many options but ultimately decided on altering Feminine hormone levels and stabilizing them through pharmaceuticals for the purpose of temporarily preventing conception. Introduction to body via monthly intra-muscular injection to the gluteus maximus."

"Oh, right," he nodded, not quite SURE of what she just said. Be he understood part. "Thank heavens," he murmured with a sigh into her hair as he lowered himself onto her, relieved.

The Merc continued to make love to his wife...but began this time to caress slowly--he moved within her almost gently. The glassy look in her eye as she spoke earlier was something he had missed, and he had been waiting to touch her, to taste her, to melt into her...for months now.

Evidently, however, River balked at the retraint he was showing. She was still a bit frenzied, so she yanked her hands from between them and once again sunk her nails into his firm buttocks; then she bit his shoulder savagely and rose impatiently to meet his thrusts--with this, River wordlessly urged him to take her more forcefully, more quickly. Jayne released another hiss when she licked the wound, and bit another on the opposite shoulder...while the silky feel of her hair as the waves trailed around and down his arm made his toes curl. Her mewl of pleasure/passion prompted him to grab the locks into aa meaty fist, roll them both over to one side, and with a loud crack

He spank her.

"You are playing with Fire, Prometheus," she whispered into his ear, a delightfully wicked grin hidden as she planned how to go about chaining HIM up in the future.

He did it again and she squirmed against him frantically.

Rubbing her ass cheek gently to soothe the burn, he told her "Plenty more where that came from!"

"That was surprisingly arousing; do it again!" she ordered him, still trying to press against his body, or ride his thigh.

So he did.

Keening from the pleasure she cried out, "I want you NOW; I need you." Whimpering, she finally begged, "Jayne, please! Do not hold-back, nor worry about injuring me," she commanded him.

With his weight still supported almost completly by his right elbow, he laughed assuridly, roughly hauled her hips up to meet his and began to thrust more powerfully. He did not hold back; he unleashed the full magnitude of his passion for her, on her, in her, around her...something that never failed to take River's breath away, even after all this time. It was a feeling she reveled in, experiencing it all so completely that the tips of her hair tingled.

THIS was what it felt like to be alive, she thought triumphantly to herself.

Quickly flipping him over, River firmly pinned his hands to the mattress by his head. Forcefully she tucked her legs under her and straddled his hips, then she mounted him roughly and rode him fiercely. Yes, Jayne definitely got back every bit as good as he gave, and he watched her, enthralled, as she brought them both to explosive orgasms.

After a second round of unrestrained sex, River lay on her stomach as Jayne slowly trailed kisses down her back. When he got to her bottom, he palmed one of the globes and asked, "So, did it hurt?"

Without lifting her face from the pillow, she asked, "Did what hurt? Clarify please."

"The shot, woman! I am already down here 'cause I figured I oughta do somethin' 'bout these hand prints. Didn't mean to make nothing hurt more...I could try and kiss it better for ya," he responded with a smirk, and then proceeded to do so, firmly laving her buttocks with his silky tongue.

River moaned loudly, enthusiastically, as his goatee arousingly tickled and scratched her tender flesh, and she leaned to the side to tell him, "Oh, that. I am not certain, but I will definitely let you know--I am scheduled to get the first one in two weeks."

"Maybe," she added with a naughty smile. 


	6. Revenge of the Sibling

"Revenge of the Sibling":

Everyone but Simon was surprised when River exclaimed that she felt the need to push.

"AGAIN?" asked Jayne, who was gently holding his newborn son. "I thought them urges was gone once the baby was out!"

When Jayne realized Simon was about to deliver another baby, he paled considerably and looked quite faint. Zoe took the squalling boy from him, just in case.

"I've been DYING to tell you," he told the panicking father, "But you were adamant about not knowing anything!"

No one noticed the 4 year-old brunette mop-top wander out of the infirmary and into the cargo bay. A few minutes later she returned carrying an EVA helmet and gloves, which she handed to her father.

"Do I gotta call you Tarth Raider now Daddy?" she asked.

Once the laughter died down the exhausted River told her husband: "You have GOT to stop letting her watch that movie!" 


	7. Teat for Two

Title: Teat for Two Author: bugchicklv Etc: unBETAed, no idea of word count. RayneTwinBabyFic...yada yada.

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"Whaddaya mean you need help feedin' 'em? You got two right there--one for each of them," Jayne stated, as if the answer was obvious, while pointing at her chest.

River rolled her eyes, shifted their son more securely on her breast, and told him: "Infants growing exponentially; need more than I can produce. Nutritional supplementation necessary, but we do not have the appropriate item. Must have Simon concoct substitute when he returns, but for now, will have to settle for bovine lactation products."

Jayne cocked his head and blinked at her.

She sighed and wondered again what had made her fall for the big lug, let alone chose to procreate with him.

"There's powdered milk in the kitchen. Follow the directions on the package, EXACTLY."

And he did just that. But after rummaging in all the cabinets and lockers and drawers for something to put it in, the Merc threw up his hands in frustation and wished once again that he had gone out on the job with Mal, Zoe, Simon and Kaylee.

Carry a gun, look tough, growl occassionally, shoot people when I gotta, tote the heavy stuff...THAT'S the stuff I am good at, he thought. NOT stuff like this.

Jayne sighed and turned around to search through the mess again when he felt his little girl hug his leg tightly. He picked her up and set her on the counter.

"You're a good Daddy," she told him. "And you're good at lots of Daddy-stuff too: you tell me stories, you strum me to sleep, you give big hugs, you play hide and seek, you sneak me candy, you make me feel safe. You'll think of something; I believe in you."

She kissed his cheek, hopped down, and skipped off...no doubt headed for Inara's shuttle.

Lightly touching his cheek where she kissed him, Jayne spent only a second on the sobering thought that his eldest daughter was taking after her mother in something quite different than just her looks. Then, he looked at his fingers, got an idea and ran down to the infirmary.

Jayne chuckled a bit imagining Simon's reaction to the room's condition (again). Then he picked up the jury-rigged "bottle" and returned to his and River's very crowded bunk.

Once there, he gently lifted the hungry baby girl out of the well-worn bassinette--a cradle that he had hand-crafted in preparation for their first child. He softly stroked her cheek to prepare her, and placed the thick surgical glove, with the small needle holes in the finger, into her rooting, open mouth. Jayne grinned at his wife with pride when the infant began sucking vigorously.

The big man swaggered across the small space to sit down in the rocking chair he had made for River; then he cuddled the happily nursing baby closer to his chest, closed his eyes and began to slowly rock.

Finally done with nursing the more demanding infant boy, River rose gracefully and tucked him into the blankets of the bassinette his sister had just vacated. Silently, she tip-toed over to her husband and daughter, placed a blanket over them both and kissed him soundly.

"Now I remember why," she whispered.

And before anyone freaks, I KNOW that smallish infants should not have cow's milk, let alone drink it from something that could possibly pop and choke them. But this is The Black. You make do with what you got, and these were things I imagined would be most readily accessible on Serenity. 


	8. Lesser of Three Evils

TITLE: Lesser of Three Evils  
AUTHOR: bugchicklv  
DISCLAIMER: Not mine! I just like to take them out and play every now and again. Would LOVE to have that Jayne "action figure" (wink wink--DOLL) to play with though. Christmas is just...eh, nevermind. Bah Humbug.  
PROMPT: #60 Drink  
SUMMARY: Oh, Jayne. You did WHAT?  
WORD COUNT??? (Word not reloaded yet)  
RATING: G  
CHARACTERS: Jayne/River IMPLIED, Mal  
SPOILERS: None  
NOTES: Yes. This is SOOOOO very wrong. But I had to do it, cause it was eating at my brain.

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"You did what?" River asked her husband indignantly. "He is still a prepubescent adolescent boy, Jayne! What were you thinking?"

"Baby girl...he's 12 years old and he did such a good job as look-out on the job today..." he protested.

She cut him off quickly with a: "Not relevant."

"Well, I had it by his age..." Jayne protested, but halted as Mal limped into the common area. It had been a while, but the injury still pained him; one of these days he was going to learn not to deal with Patience.

River frowned at her husband and gave him that_ 'We will sooooo be talking aobut his later as you get no sex'_ look; she then turned on her heel and stormed out.

Mal shivered, trying to be funny, and asked, "Is it me, or did the temperature suddenly drop 10 degrees in here?"

"My girl is pissed."

"Whyfore? Scary as it may seem, you been pretty tame lately."

"After the job I took Nicky into town and stopped at a bar. He asked for a sip o' my whiskey and I gave it to him."

"You did what?"

"That's what she said. Honestly Mal, it was just a sip...and like I said, I'd done had some by that age?"

"So, she's pissed you gave your 12 year-old son a taste of your liquor. Seems like she's got a point, Jayne."

"Well, I had to," the Merc explained. "He took too long picking out a tattoo and the hooker scared him."


	9. And Not A Drop To Drink

TITLE: ...And Not A Drop To Drink  
AUTHOR: bugchicklv  
DISCLAIMER: Not mine! Joss is God (so are Rockne and JMS, but those are other fandoms)! Yeah, go ahead and try to sue. GOOD LUCK GETTIN' MONEY! ROFTLMAO!  
PROMPT: #51 Water  
SUMMARY: Oh, what kids will do.  
WORD COUNT: 285ish  
RATING: G (but a little off-humor)  
CHARACTERS: Jayne/River IMPLIED, Kaylee, Orig. Character (Francesca--aka: Frankie--River and Jayne's oldest child)  
SPOILERS: None  
NOTES: Again, this is sooooooo very wrong, but I had to do it! I saw my 3 year old doing almost the same thing. ACK! wishes she hadn't stopped him

ooooooooooooooo

"Frankie, baby girl? Go get Daddy a glass o' water, 'K?" a very drunk Jayne Cobb asked his precocious 3 year old daughter, Francesca.

As he waited, the merc tried to get more comfortable on the common room sofa--snuggling down into the cushions and trying to get away from the knowledge that his wife was pregnant for the second time in 3 years.

Mal was gonna kill him. Or cut it off.

Francesca happily brought a full sippy cup to her father. She smiled proudly as he drained it and said, "Thankee muches Frankie."

He asked for a refill, and once again his daughter provided it. On the third trip for more water Kaylee noticed Francesca and followed her to find out just how she was filling that cup. After all, the girl was too short to reach the infirmary sink, and since the mechanic was headed toward the kitchen to fix _that _one...she knew the little thing wasn't getting it there.

A few minutes later Sunshine and Strawberries almost tripped and broke a leg in her haste to run and tell Simon. She picked herself up and laughed so hard she nearly peed her pants.

In the infirmary, heads together, she whispered the juicy tidbit to her husband. Then the girl and the doctor laughed uproariously. With a nod, it was decided to tuck that away as one of those priceless moments you treasure when no one else is around.

'Cause there weren't no power in the 'Verse strong enough to make them tell Jayne Cobb that his pride and joy, Daddy's Little Girl, named-her-Francesca/Frankie-himself was getting the cool water he guzzled so eagerly...

…from the unisex bathroom's toilet bowl in the passenger dorm.


End file.
